EACH DAY IS A LESSON

 I am guessing I am a bit reflective this week due to my quickly approaching 51st birthday on Friday..
 I always get reflective at birthday times...   usually it is a time of great regret for me .. a time when I am not thinking about how far I have come  or changes ... but more so .. just a time of shrugging my shoulders.. and just going forward... same old me.. same old weight.. or gaining and nothing changing with in me...

 I have said this multiple times... but it is a defining fact... a simple conversation on FB led to the flame that ignited the spark that helped change my life...  This birthday I am 38 pounds lighter,  this birthday .. I feel proud...  this birthday ... while the road still may be long I actually can see myself succeeding...   In 3 months my life has changed dramatically...    Each day I plan for my future... and how I will hold on to this success...  I think the most important thing about weight loss  and maintaining a healthy weight is working mostly on the core of who you are... on the core of what has caused you to hide or be trapped in such a unhealthy body...   A lot of large folk would disagree with me.. saying Hey I am fat and I am fine .. no health problems...  that may well be the case for the moment.. but being morbidly obese.. will eventually cut your life short... the human body is not built to support such an abundance of weight... your internal organs suffer... your bones suffer,  your joints suffer.. and that is the reality ... 

Being a person who lives with Fibromyalgia and chronic pain .. I know that the above is true... yet it never motivated me to lose weight...  It was like I was in a constant battle with myself.. of knowing I should not eat this or that.. but doing it anyway just to spite myself.. just because I wanted what I wanted and I wanted it now... I wanted that Magnum bar with  NO consequences,  I wanted that big slice of pizza  or whatever I wanted .. the bread... etc...   so I kept eating that way telling my husband that I was trying to lose weight... telling the world I was trying  ... but I was not... I was not at all.... Until July 8th 2013.... one week prior on our Colorado trip .. I was eating healthier and better.. but not yet on program .. but due to the walking we did on our trip and the better eating I lost 4 pounds that week.. then started TSFL the following week on July 8th..  
 The program has not been easy.... so I will not say ohhh this is so easy.. its not... but sometimes desire overrides the mind and in my case my desire to be stronger and healthier ... has led me on this path...  I have been surrounded by tempting foods... and sometimes it can be difficult  ... but the DESIRE and the LESSONS I have learned in the last 3 months.. not to mention the self discovery too has been overwhelming  .. more overwhelming than the desire to eat....
To see that my former clothes  size 20 / 18 plus size  swim on me and that I now wear a size 12  regular .. and 12 short.. is amazing.. more than amazing... exciting...   .. It is still very hard for me to go shopping I get uncomfortable in stores.... but I am working on that    ( haha) ...
 
The mind on this journey is so  bizarre there are days that I can feel my body losing weight and days I can see the difference and then there are days that I am like  the Michellan man.. ( that white tire dude monster thing)  days where I feel so big .. so distorted that I fail to see any accomplishment~ that I am more so that morbidly obese person I was  than who I am now... Its tough...  ...

So each day I learn something new .. be  it a recipe.... be it something about myself.. each day I learn just how strong I really am..  EACH DAY IS A LESSON...