SIZE MATTERS

Don't get your hopes up.... its not that kind of post..... however it is this kind of post...
Pain level was high this morning but I said to myself I am getting out of bed and going to the gym... I can not get in the pool right now.... just too many temperature changes... (indoor pool) ... will start again once it warms up a bit outside...  I was determined to see about walking on the treadmill and see how it felt... I was also feeling deeply sorry for myself.. because I was hurting so bad and I was angry .. resentful... even...  Why after losing more than 50 pounds.. am I not feeling better... in the sense of reduced pain levels...  I have begun to think that Fibromyalgia has invited a friend over called arthritis ... though I am not sure about that... So.. anyways.. I was getting dressed... I knew my former gym clothes... ( if you want to call them that) .. were size 2-3x  so I knew they would be too big.. I guessed I was a XL  so I bought some XL pants.. and I tired on a L jacket.. before I got that .. did not try on pants just assumed they would fit... I also bought a xl top.. Since it was a fitted top I thought XL would work.... WELLLLLLL much to my shock... I am not a XL.. in fact I am a L.. I can wear the XL they are somewhat big but not unwearable.. but the L is what actually fits like they are suppose to... after the gym this morning I got a L pair of work out pants and a couple L tops... Now I have 3 things to wear to work out in... and 2 very full drawers of  clothes that I need to bag up and get rid of... Its pretty amazing when I think about it... I also bought some new tops to wear too.. and the young lady insisted I was a L and even a medium in some things... she was right.. that to me is just bizarre I totally am having to really learn about the size thing.. It really does matter.. I am having to accept that I am not what I was ... and when I was what I was I knew how to shop... Shopping was never about style.. it was about what fits. Now I have choices and it can be a bit overwhelming but fun never the less..


 I also am loving finding new and healthy recipes to help me along my way too...
It is still a shock to me... to see the changes... but in a good way... I had only wished my pain would have been so receptive and leave... however.. each of us has something we have to push through and overcome.. and this is my thing.. the chronic pain... and you can bet I will continue to push through .. no matter how many times I cry I can't anymore... I honestly can say I get how people end up staying in bed... I used to think it was because of all the meds they took... and would think if they quit all the meds they could get up and move and that will help.. ... the fact is unless you  live with chronic pain.. you have no idea.. what it is about...some of us can keep fighting while others resign themselves to bed.. me I keep fighting... and pushing through....
and learning how much...
Size indeed does matter as it helps shape your destiny ... and that's a very good thing...